I had my fair share with heavy people, regardless of work, social settings, or even inside my family.
I took every little person to let my disappointment be cooked and eating in the peace of my mind. It changed when I started digging deeper in emotional intelligence, learning how to understand not only my own functions, but also to effectively manage them.
One of my biggest breakthroughs came when I understood emotionally intelligent individuals that they use general behavior, especially when they confuse people who seem to run out of energy.
In this post I would like to share that “never do” behavior. If you have ever found a tense conversation in your mind, or you want to answer a better answer, these ideas can help you find a more efficient way.
Think of them as a deceit to keep your cool and keeping your dignity, no matter how hard the other person is.
Let’s dive.
1: They never take the bait
I remember once in my early career when a colleague’s cutting talk about my performance skills.
At first I wanted to back down with something equally harmful. But then I paused, noticing anger that blows inside me.
Instead of returning the fire, I just accepted their criticism and asked a few questions. The moment passed without a verbal battle. Later, I realized that I was effective “I didn’t take the bait.”
What does that mean?
This means that you choose not to fall for provocations or insults designed to cause emotional response.
Emotionally smart people acknowledge that back snapping can turn a small spark into a raging wildfire. Instead of boiling flaming fuels, they are answered calm or, in some cases, they do not answer at all.
This leads to a sense of control.
It is more important that it leaves no place for drama. It’s not about being passive. It’s about defending the situation skillfully, refusing to engage in meaningless arguments.
2. They never jump to blame
Sin is an easy trap. It is a common leak in morality, and it does not fall on any goodwill that could exist among colleagues.
Emotionally intelligent individuals out of this guilty game. If a problem arises, they focus on understanding what happened, not who has been mixed.
This does not mean that they ignore mistakes. They turn to them, but their emphasis is on learning and improvement.
They can say something like that. “Let’s find out how we can prevent it from happening again” than pointing fingers.
Why is this important?
Because sin rarely corrects anything. It just breeds frustration and stimulates the culture of fear.
When you replace sin with the problem solving, you create an environment where people feel safe to find mistakes and find solutions.
3 They never forget the boundaries
Difficult people can sometimes stretch your patience until the limit.
But there is something I learned about those in emotional intelligence. They know their personal limits.
They are kind, they listen and they are open to hearing another person’s view. They still do not allow others to violate their limits.
Think about a situation for a moment when someone’s negativity began to see your life. Maybe he was a friend who always needed a favor or partner consistently overwhelmed by their tasks on you.
A healthy answer involves clear about what you can and can’t do.
Emotionally smart people say “no” when it is necessary. They can express it gently. “I’m sorry, but now I can’t take it,” they are standing strong.
Having bounds is very important for your mental health. It ensures that you keep dry or manipulated by others.
I believe that real goodness includes respect first, so you can really spread that respect for others.
4: They never forget compassion
When they face someone who is facing or rude, it is tempting to label them as a “toxic person” and move forward.
But emotionally smart people don’t automatically write to people automatically. They pause what can be under the surface.
Were they engaged in stress house? Has something happened to work that causes this sudden blast of anger?
I don’t suggest we justify bad behavior. There is a difference between exercising compassion and giving the opportunity to negatively.
It’s about to confess that we all have moments when stress or fear makes us take action from the characteristics. Given the root cause of someone’s difficult behavior, you sometimes find the opportunity to spread tension.
A simple comment, “You seem to be a little stressed, something in your mind.” can transform the conversation. It can not always lead to a heartfelt solution, but it can hinder the situation into a full collision.
Another corner of Ecati is self-reflection. Sometimes it’s our own stress or insecurities that lit the conflict.
Recognizing it is a powerful step towards a solution. If you can give birth to both yourself and the other person, you will better help you sail the tension without aggravating it.
5: They never approach feedback
Difficult matches often contain spots of truth we didn’t resist.
Perhaps the person who criticizes you does it in a rigid way, but there is a valid idea that is hidden in their words.
It is difficult to separate content from content when we attack attack, but emotionally smart people train just to do so.
There was once I received tough reactions to a personal brand factory that I ran. My first instinct was to remove the reviewer as “difficult” work.
After a short explosion of frustration, I read their words and found them had a valid point. My seminar did not affect the most important step in the construction of the brand.
I could ignore that insight, but I decided to review my content, and my workshop was improved as a result.
Harvard business review He noted that effective leaders are those who can filter noise without ignoring constructive criticism.
It doesn’t mean to let people slide on you. This means that there is a sufficiently open mindset to realize that even in case of unpleasant interactions can be something worth hearing.
6: They never let it slip
I get it. Keeping a brush can feel like a moral victory to claim someone who made you wrong.
The problem is that rawls rarely punish the other person. They punish you. Turning around the indignation is like wearing a heavy bag every day. It slows down and drives your energy.
Emotionally intelligent people appreciate their peace to allow them to have free rent in their minds. When they make a mistake, they cultivate their feelings, maybe the valve on a trusted friend or consultant, then actively choose to move forward.
It can mean to forgive the other person, or it can mean a reduction in connections if the relationship is harmful. Or or in the scenario they release frustration, so it doesn’t keep them on them anymore.
I have found that leaving Grudges does not mean that you delete the boundaries or forget the lessons you have learned. It just means you don’t let the past dictate your present mental state.
There is a feeling of liberation freedom, determining that you will not be defined on how someone else treats you.
Conclusion
Dealing with difficult people can feel like a crane struggle, but there is strength, recognizing what emotional intelligent individuals never do.
The use of these six habits may not solve every conflict immediately, but they will respond to how you react and how you feel after that.
The next time you feel the tension growth, take a break for a moment. Ask yourself. “Which of these six points can I turn to now?” Even small moving can help the situation to escalate and protect the peace of your mind.
After all, we are talking about self-knowledge and willingness to grow. When we master it, dealing with difficult people stops being a burden and begins to become more resistant, compassionate and confident who are we.