My mother said: “Time treats all wounds.” But let’s be honest, not all wounds treat with time. Some just get hidden.
We’ve all been there, don’t we? We plastered with a smile when we hurt inside our pain, it seems nothing but a meat fly.
But let’s cut the chase.
True healing is not about disguising your emotional bruises. It’s about to recognize them, understanding them and working through them.
So how do you say that someone really doesn’t heal, but just learn how to hide their wounds better? Here are seven signs to follow.
1) They avoid talking about the problem
Have you ever tried to make a sensitive topic with someone, only to quickly change them?
This can be a sign that they are not so ready to face their pain.
Avoiding is a classic tactic that we all use when we try to avoid awkward things. But the real recovery requires us to face what worries us.
It’s like getting rid of tape help can hurt at this time, but it’s the first step in recovery.
So if you notice that someone is consistently walking on certain topics, they can hide their wounds than treating them.
But remember that everyone has their own pace. You can’t hurry someone to recover, just as you can’t rush the larva to become a butterfly.
2) they look too positive
We all know that a man who always seems in a high mood no matter what. They are always on nine clouds, their lives seem to be a continuous joy.
But sometimes this unnecessary positivity can be a mask for deep pain.
Let me share a personal example. A few years back, I had a friend who had the brightest smile and the earliest laughter. He was a lady’s man. But behind closed doors, he struggled with the fight against depression.
His relentless positive was a defense mechanism, a means of keeping his real feelings. It was the way to hide his wounds from the world and himself.
If someone seems very positive, it is very happy, especially after the hard situation, they can show positive as their shield. We are not talking about exploding their bubble, to help them find balanced emotions and real treatment.
3) They are always busy
Have you ever been noticed by someone who suddenly taken five new hobby?
Sometimes we bury us in work and activities to avoid dealing with our emotions. It’s like a run on the run, you move, but really goes anywhere.
I remember when my uncle died. Instead of decisive, I threw myself into work. I was always “very busy” to feel the pain. It took me some time to understand that I just remove inevitable.
Business can be an escape form, a means of slipping emotional pain and a way to settle down everything. But, as we all know, escape from problems makes them pursue you harder.
And if someone’s calendar is filled suddenly, they can try to avoid their pain, not to avoid it. And it’s important for us to be there when they finally stopped running out of breath and are ready to face the head of the wounds.
4) They were recalled
Sometimes people who hurt choose to isolate themselves. They retreat their shells like turtle sensitive danger.
It’s not like they suddenly don’t like the company. It’s just that they are trying to make loneliness with their emotions, or maybe try to hide their suffering from the world.
I have seen it happens to my close friend. After a rough collapse, he became a little hermit, preferring his book company to people. It was a new one to hide his pain under the guise of the newly created invasion.
If someone you know becomes unusual recall, it can be a sign that they mask their wounds instead of treating them.
It is important to inform that it is good to be vulnerable, and that they do not need to face their pain alone. Because treatment is not a journey alone. It’s a way we walk together.
5) The forms of their sleeping have changed
Sleep as it turns out closely related to our emotional health. Studies have shown that people who are engaged in unregulated emotional issues often feel changes in their sleep patterns.
They may have slept very much, as if they are trying to avoid their reality in a dream. Or, they can sleep at all, their thoughts are too busy with painful memories or worry about the future.
I remember a stage when I passed a personal crisis and found himself to sleep or all day I looked at the ceiling. My sleeping directly affected the turmoil I felt inside.
Remember that the word has forced them to “get out of it, but helping them find healthier ways to develop their pain.
6) They quickly assure you the good
“I’m good.” Two words, so simple but so complicated.
We have all used these words when we are far from the penalty, aren’t we? It’s like Reflex, a protective wall we build to make others see our pain.
My boyfriend said that by such conviction, you never guessed the tears that he would like to stay in solitude. He looked like a witch, expert with pain in front of others.
But the thing is that it’s not good to be good. And it’s good that others see you are not good. Because we all have our battles, our wounds, our scars. And sharing them does not allow us to make us human.
Knowing someone is too fast to reassure you that they are fine they can hide their wounds than healing. And that’s when they need your understanding and compassion.
Because real treatment begins when we leave the need to hide our pain.
7) They have become extremely defensive
When the wound is fresh, we instinctively protect it, don’t we? It’s the same with emotional wounds. People who hurt often become extremely defensive. They can react strongly to harmless comments or critiques, perceiving them as threats.
These raised defense is their way of protecting their healing wounds from further pain. But by doing so, they just hide their pain without implementing it.
Remember that treatment does not mean to build higher walls but finding them to reduce strength. It’s open to feel, hurt and eventually to treat.
So if someone suddenly becomes extremely defensive, they probably struggle hidden in March.
And your role? To be patient and compassion, reminding them that it is not about how well they hide their wounds, but how boldly they treat them.
Accepting the way of treatment
If you see yourself or someone you know in these signs, remember, it’s okay. We have all been there, hiding our wounds under a brave face. But the real recovery requires us to peel that mask and resist our pain.
The good news is that starting is never too late. Treatment is a journey rather than a destination. It’s about learning to walk around our pain instead of ourselves.
Start by accepting your feelings no matter how uncomfortable they will be. Small actions of self-service and self-esteem can take a long way into this journey.
If you support someone else on their healing journey, be patient. Be kind. Treatment cannot be rushed. Sometimes they need someone who will sit with them with them, reminding them that they are not alone.
Remember what Karl Jung was once. “I’m not what happened to me, I am what I choose.” You are not defined by your wounds, but how do you prefer to treat them?
Relax deep breath and hug the healing journey with all its ups and falls. Because at the end of the day, we are not talking about our wounds better, but about treating them better. One step at a time.