When someone says you’re “too sensitive” it’s easy to believe them, after all, they have to know you, right?
Being told you’re “too sensitive” might make you question your feelings and reality, but it might not apply to you at all.
If you feel this way, it could be a sign that a gaslighting narcissist is manipulating you.
In fact, sometimes the “you’re too sensitive” line is just a trick used by people who don’t want to take responsibility for their actions, and we call people who use that tactic “narcissistic narcissists.”
Here are eight signs that your sensitivity isn’t the problem.
1) They constantly doubt you
Life is a ladder of emotions, isn’t it?
Sometimes you’re up, sometimes you’re down, and it’s normal, it’s natural to feel a wide range of emotions in response to life’s ups and downs.
But when you’re around someone who constantly makes you question your own feelings, it becomes a problem.
You see, gaslighting narcissists have a knack for making you feel like you’re overreacting or “oversensitive.”
They twist your reality, making you question your own emotional responses.
Your feelings are valid. don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
2) They play the blame game
Here’s something about gassing narcissists. they never admit their mistakes. it’s always someone else’s fault, usually yours.
Here I will share a personal experience. i had this girlfriend let’s call her emma.
Now Emma had a knack for turning things around.
If he was late to our meetings, it was because I hadn’t reminded him. if he forgot my birthday it was because i didn’t make a big deal of it.
Basically, Emma never took responsibility for her mistakes and it was always about how I or someone else should have done things differently.
Constantly being blamed for things that aren’t your fault and made to feel guilty about them is another sign that you’re dealing with a gaslighting narcissist.
3) They have selective memory
Gaslight narcissists are known for their selective memory, as they will easily forget promises they made, bad things they said, or hurtful actions they took.
Selective memory, or selective amnesia, is clinically defined as the ability to recall certain facts and events but not others, and can stem from a variety of causes, ranging from psychological coping mechanisms to neurological factors; because they consider some information to be pointless (or simply of no value to them).
If someone in your life often “forgets” about their wrongdoings and uses it as an excuse, then you already know why they do it.
4) They crush your emotions
Everyone has the right to their feelings. we are all unique individuals with different perspectives and reactions.
However, if someone in your life always dismisses your concerns as unimportant, consider: Gaslighting narcissists have a habit of making you feel like your feelings are trivial or exaggerated.
Remember that your feelings are important and deserve to be acknowledged.
5) They make you apologize… a lot
I remember a moment when I kept saying sorry. sorry for being sad, sorry for expressing my feelings and sorry for just being me.
Here’s what I learned. If you’re always apologizing, especially when it’s not warranted, you may be dealing with a gaslighting narcissist because they have this knack for turning situations around to make you feel like you’re always in the wrong.
With this in mind, I realized that it’s not okay to always be apologetic.
6) They are irresistibly charming
You’d think that someone who gives you such an emotional upheaval wouldn’t be someone you’d enjoy being around, right?
Well, here comes the tricky part.
Most gaslight narcissists can be incredibly charming because they know just what to say to win you over and keep you hooked.
They will shower you with compliments in no time and make you feel special.
They use this charm as a way of keeping close to you, making it difficult for you to discover their manipulative tactics.
7) They are constantly draining you
Interactions shouldn’t leave you feeling drained or drained all the time.
Sure, we all have those days when the energy is a little low, but if you notice a pattern of emotional exhaustion after spending time with a particular person, that’s a red flag.
These emotional vampires can drain the energy from you with their constant need for attention and their manipulative tactics and leave you feeling empty and worn out.
8) Your gut is telling you something is wrong
Trust your intuition; our intuition is our natural defense mechanism that alerts us when something isn’t quite right.
If you constantly feel uneasy around someone, if your gut is telling you that their behavior toward you is not normal or healthy, listen to it.
Your intuition can often spot a gaslighting narcissist even before all the pieces come together.
Trust it, it’s there to protect you after all.
Embrace your sensitivity
If you have read this article, you may realize that you are not “overly sensitive”. Instead, you may be dealing with a gas-guzzling narcissist in your life.
But let’s shift our focus for a moment. Let’s talk about your sensitivity.
Your sensitivity is not a weakness. It’s a strength. It makes you compassionate, empathetic and understanding. It allows you to connect deeply with others and the world around you.
As author Anton St. Maarten wrote, “Highly sensitive people are too often seen as weak or damaged goods. Feeling intensely is not a symptom of weakness; it is the mark of being truly alive and empathetic.”
So embrace your sensitivity, it’s part of who you are, and most importantly, remember that you deserve to always be treated with respect and kindness.