There are moments in life when they go up, as if the only option is.
You want to protect yourself, prove a point or fill in awkward silence. But not all the situation is the title of words. In fact, sometimes the most powerful thing you can do is stay calm.
It’s not always easy. One can react to, explain or react, can be overwhelming. But the ancient stoix believed that silence is often a wise way out of fear or avoidance, but because restraint can lead to clearness and better decisions.
We tend to think that talking is always the right step that remains silent means weakness or surrender. But what if that’s not true? What if you know when not talking is actually one of the valuable skills you can develop?
Here are seven scenarios where keeping calm is not just an option. That’s the best thing you can do.
1) When I Reaction In Anger
Anger is one of the fastest ways to lose control over what I said.
At the moment, the words come quickly quickly. I can say something I really don’t mean or I will regret something as soon as the emotions are settled. Stoix believed that the clouds of anger were judged, making the situation clearly.
Silence, on the other hand, gives me time to pause.
It allows me to restore control before saying something harmful. If I keep quiet when anger flies, I give me a place to think, reflect and choose my words carefully.
Not all reactions should be raised. Sometimes the best answer is not a response unless my mind is clear again.
2) When I know my words will only be worse
There have been times when I talked just to prove a point, even though I knew it wouldn’t help.
I remember an argument, in particular, one of the pointless back and the pointless one we really heard. I constantly pushed to try to get the last word trying to win.
But I did all that I did the situation until we both walked more poorly than before.
Stoix taught that talking without purpose is a waste of energy.
If my words will not bring clarity, formula or understanding, then what is the meaning? Silence does not mean to give up. It’s about to recognize the word when it comes to fuel alone.
Not everything is an answer. Sometimes the strongest thing I can do is stay calm and let the moment go.
3) When I am tempted to talk just to fill the silence
Abraham Lincoln once said: “It is better to be silent and think stupid than to talk and remove all doubts.”
I was necessarily guilty just to avoid inconvenience. Whether a conversation with the congregation or even standing next to a stranger, I have felt that it is urge to say anything to break the silence.
But more often than not, these words don’t give anything to value.
Stoix believed that silence was not empty. It is full of meaning. It creates a place of thought to observe, to understand what really happens around me instead of filling out with unnecessary words.
Talking out of anxiety is not a real communication. If I have nothing meaningful to say, stay calm is always a better option.
4) When I still did not fully understood the situation
Greek philosopher Zeno, who founded Stoicism, believed that nature gave us two ears and one mouth, we must hear twice than to talk.
I have noticed that when I jump to respond very quickly, I often miss something important. Whether it’s a conversation, disagreement or even new information, my first reaction is not always my best.
Talking words can be based on assumptions soon, not to understand.
First of all, wisdom assessed wisdom, and wisdom requires patience. If I do not fully understand what’s going on if I still look at things together, it can be closed soon in a position I can implement later.
Returning gives me time to absorb, reflect and answer so that it is actually useful, not only reactive.
5) When my ego is speaking
There is a difference between speaking and talking about talking, just to protect my pride.
I caught me in conversations where I really didn’t try to understand the other person. I just wanted to be right. I wanted to prove that I knew more I had a better argument so I didn’t return.
But in those moments I did not speak of wisdom. I was talking about the ego.
Stoix has warned of allowing pride control decisions, as ego distorts reality. It’s everything a struggle that needs to be overcome when everything in the truth is not competitions at all.
If my words are due as smart, superior or victorious, they do not come from the place of strength. They come from insecurity. And in those moments silence is a better choice.
6) When I try to control what others think
It is easy to fall, justify or protect it easily to understand myself.
I did it a lot of time, explaining my decisions with unnecessary detail, trying to make sure everyone else can see me in the light possible.
But the truth is to what extent I say, I can’t control how others perceive me. People will think about what they want to think.
Stox believed that my energy spends better on what I could control, my own actions, my own character. Managing each opinion about us is exhaustive and eventually meaningless.
Silence is not about passive. It’s about to know when my words will actually change anything. If I’m talking just to form another’s point of view, it can stay better and allow my actions to talk to them.
7) When I realize that listening is more valuable than talking
Not all conversation does not need to be introduced.
There were times when I was so focused on what I wanted to say next, because I could hardly hear what the other person really really said.
I really don’t listen. I was just waiting to talk to my talk. And because of that I missed things that really important.
Stoix believed that true wisdom comes from view and understanding, not all the dominant conversations. If I am very busy with my own answer I don’t study anything new.
Sometimes the best way to promote, giving someone giving all my attention without interruption without hitting my own prospect. The real connection occurs in the silence of words.
Bottom line
Silence is not a weakness. It is not avoided. It doesn’t give up. It’s a choice. One that requires discipline, patience and trust.
Stoxy understood that words have strength, but the lack of them is. They believed that the real force arose to possessing yourself, not to try to control everything around you.
If I can stop prior to responding if I can recognize when I talk no purpose, if I can back down, instead of allowing me to be much more valuable.
Marcus Aurelius once wrote: Implement it and find strength. ” That power begins in the moments when I choose silence because of the noise.