Getting older brings wisdom, but sometimes it also comes with habits that can make us less likeable.
It’s a difficult balance of maintaining our individuality while striving to be someone others enjoy being around.
The good news. These habits are not set in stone, you can choose to let them go and become more likeable as you age.
In this article, we will explore 9 subtle habits that you can say goodbye to if you want to stay loved as you grow older.
Let’s dive in!
1) Complain about the past
As we age, it’s easy to slip into the habit of lamenting the “good old days.” You know, the times when things were supposedly better.
While it’s natural to feel nostalgic, constantly complaining about the past can make you seem negative and stuck in a bygone era.
Remember that the people around you live in the present. They want to connect with someone who is also present and excited about the here and now.
Being overly nostalgic and focusing more on the present moment can make you more lovable and likable as you get older, so the next time you find yourself in a “back in the day” story, try steering the conversation toward the present or the future.
Of course, it’s important to share your experience and wisdom, but balance is key.
After all, who doesn’t like hanging out with someone who is excited about life right now?
2) resistance to new technologies
I used to be the person who stubbornly embraced new technology, “Why do I need a smartphone when my old flip phone works just fine?” I would argue.
But over time, I realized that this habit made me seem aloof and even a little irritable. People, especially younger people, became hesitant to share interesting technological advances with me because they knew I would just brush them off.
So I decided to make a change, I got myself a smartphone and had my tech savvy nephew teach me how to use it, it was a struggle at first. But I soon realized how much easier it made my life, from getting directions to keeping in touch with friends.
And the best part. People began to see me as more approachable. They no longer saw me as a stingy old-timer who resisted change, but as someone who was willing to learn and adapt.
3) not respecting personal boundaries
As we age, it’s easy to feel like we’ve earned the right to speak our minds freely, even when they’re unsolicited, but this can often lead to overstepping personal boundaries.
A study by the University of Georgia found that people who respect others’ personal boundaries are more likely to be approved and accepted by their peers.This doesn’t change as we get older.
If you tend to give advice without asking or ask too personal questions, you may want to reconsider this habit. Respecting personal boundaries is a fundamental part of maintaining a healthy relationship at any age.
When you’re about to offer unsolicited advice or delve into someone’s personal affairs, take a step back.
4) indifference to younger generations
It’s all too common for older individuals to ignore the opinions or experiences of younger generations. “You’ll understand when you’re older” statements can be patronizing and condescending, even if that’s not the intent.
Remember that everyone’s perspective is shaped by their unique experiences and age does not necessarily equate to wisdom. Younger generations have valuable insights and experiences to share.
Instead of writing off their views, try engaging in meaningful conversation. Ask them questions about their experiences and perspectives. You might be surprised what you learn.
Being open minded to the younger generations can make you more likeable and approachable, contributing to better relationships with those around you.
5) Focus too much on the clock
As we get older, it’s easy to become overly time-conscious, always rushing to get things done and complaining about wasted time, but this habit can make us feel impatient and irritable.
Although timing is important, being in too much of a hurry can get in the way of our relationships with others.
Try to be patient and attentive. Let conversations flow naturally without feeling the need to rush them. Take time to really listen and connect with people.
By saying goodbye to your obsession with time, you’ll be more present and pleasant to be around.You’ll come across as someone who values relationships more than just checking off tasks on a to-do list.
6) Holding on to resentment
Life is too short to hold grudges. As we grow older, years of disagreements and disagreements can weigh on our hearts and minds.
While it’s natural to feel hurt and upset, carrying these negative feelings around for years can make us less likeable.
Forgiveness isn’t about forgetting or ignoring wrongs done to us. It’s about finding peace and moving on. It’s about letting go of the bitterness that can taint our relationships with others.
By learning to forgive, you’ll not only find personal peace, but you’ll also become a more lovable person, because after all, who doesn’t want to be around someone who exudes grace?
7) Neglecting self-care
I’ve always been the type to put others first. I often neglected my own needs to make sure others were taken care of. As I got older, I realized that this habit not only affected my health, but also how others perceive me.
While it may seem selfless to always put others first, neglecting self-care can lead to burnout and resentment.
I started making time for myself, whether it was reading a book, going for a walk, or just enjoying a quiet cup of coffee. Not only did I feel healthier and happier, but I also found that people enjoyed my company more.
8) Being set in your ways
As we age, we often become set in our ways. We have our routines, our preferences, and we are not always open to change. This can seem rigid and unattainable to us.
But here’s the thing. life is about growth and change.By staying open to new experiences, ideas and people, we continue to learn and grow.
Being adaptable doesn’t mean you have to compromise your core values or beliefs, it just means being willing to consider different perspectives and be open to new experiences.
So try a new restaurant your friend recommends. Listen to your grandchild’s favorite band. Read a book in a genre you’ve never tried before.
By letting go of the stiffness, you’ll become more likable and approachable while continuing to grow as you get older.
9) not expressing gratitude
One of the most powerful habits you can adopt to become more lovable as you age is expressing gratitude. A simple “thank you” can go a long way in making someone feel valued and appreciated.
Not only does gratitude make others feel good, it also has a positive effect on our well-being.Studies have shown that gratitude can reduce stress, improve our mood, and even promote physical health.
Start by appreciating the little things in life. Thank your partner for making coffee in the morning. Let your neighbor know you appreciate their help.
Constantly expressing gratitude can change the way people perceive you. It’s a powerful way to become more lovable as you get older, and it’s a habit worth cultivating.